hartbig-and-bowties

swornswans:

bralpha:

bralpha:

so yesterday i got home from my best friend’s birthday party and thirty seconds later my sister comes into my room and asks me if i can keep a secret and i said it depends and she pulled a fucking cat out from behind her back and i was like “i think we can keep this between us”

image

his name is peanut and hes this country’s most precious secret 

well now 171 people know about this you had one job

hartbig-and-bowties
search-the-castle:

ladiesloveloki:

nervous-crossbow:

yeahseeimclever:

spermjackiavelli:

miss-nerdgasmz:

modifiedmermaid:

freemindfreebody:

swift-as-the-coursing-river:

jimcavill:

Because a man has to be a sociopath to love a woman with cellulite. Screw this world. 

If all residents of hell look like Scarlett Johansson, I renounce my atheism and take up Satanism

Whoever wrote this needs to be punched. A lot.

Oh no 27. I’m 19 and have it, welcome to the non airbrushed real world.

#that article is awful #i would pay anything to look as good as her #like goddamn

I’m 20 and I have stretch marks and cellulite.

Most people get cellulite and stretch marks around 15. Literally because Puberty.

She looks hot, okay? Besides, maybe he’s just attracted to her personality GASP

A friend of mine was telling me about a conversation that she had with her boyfriend.  It went something like this:
"BF: Would you be upset if I left you for Scarlett Johansson?"
"My Friend: *looks BF dead in the eye* I would leave YOUfor Scarlett Johansson.”
And you know what….I agree 100000%.

It is an indisputable scientific fact that 99.999999% of the world population would leave their significant other for Scarlett Johansson. The sole exception to this is Scarlett Johansson, who, of course, already has herself.

search-the-castle:

ladiesloveloki:

nervous-crossbow:

yeahseeimclever:

spermjackiavelli:

miss-nerdgasmz:

modifiedmermaid:

freemindfreebody:

swift-as-the-coursing-river:

jimcavill:

Because a man has to be a sociopath to love a woman with cellulite. 
Screw this world. 

If all residents of hell look like Scarlett Johansson, I renounce my atheism and take up Satanism

Whoever wrote this needs to be punched. A lot.

Oh no 27. I’m 19 and have it, welcome to the non airbrushed real world.

#that article is awful #i would pay anything to look as good as her #like goddamn

I’m 20 and I have stretch marks and cellulite.

Most people get cellulite and stretch marks around 15. Literally because Puberty.

She looks hot, okay? Besides, maybe he’s just attracted to her personality GASP

A friend of mine was telling me about a conversation that she had with her boyfriend.  It went something like this:

"BF: Would you be upset if I left you for Scarlett Johansson?"

"My Friend: *looks BF dead in the eye* would leave YOUfor Scarlett Johansson.”

And you know what….I agree 100000%.

It is an indisputable scientific fact that 99.999999% of the world population would leave their significant other for Scarlett Johansson. The sole exception to this is Scarlett Johansson, who, of course, already has herself.